Being nice has ceased being nice
I learned long ago that “nice” in the ministerial context means “please be the willing repository of our projections and abuse; that’s part of your calling.”
In the lay context it means much the same thing, or roughly equivalent to “please be a well-behaved girl and keep your mouth shut.”
Neither one appeals to me, and I do not place “nice” on the top of my list of Qualities to Aspire To. “Nice” has not a bloody thing to do with love. It has to do with conformity.
Which reminds me of what author and psychologist James Hollis says about being nice:
Being nice has ceased being nice.
When ‘sweet,’ ‘nice,’ ‘amiable,’ easygoing,’ repeatedly apply to someone’s life, the consequences to a person’s inner life might in fact be ugly.
If I am repeatedly nice and compliant, rather than authentic, then I have ceased to be a person of values.
Exactly what the Vicki the Biker in me needed to hear. I guess I should let her out more often.
Tagged with: James Hollis
Filed under: Random
Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!